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Category: Reviews

AMC Love

View Comments August 5, 2010 | JoshPerson

I used to be the type of guy who hated most TV shows. I’d have one or two shows that I’d keep up with on a regular basis, but that was it. I was sort of happy about that fact so I could act like I was better than everyone else because I only watched good shows. No American Idol-type shows for this guy. Lately, however, that has changed dramatically. Still no American Idol, but my queue of watched shows has gotten to the point where I actually have to make a spreadsheet with season premier dates so I don’t miss any of them.

These shows I’m now addicted to have even dropped off in quality. I think it all started with Entourage and my sickness of not being able to stop watching a show once I start. Luckily AMC has jumped into my life and has raised the quality per show average drastically. I was a fan of Mad Men from almost the start, then recently I found out about Breaking Bad, which you can read about here. Things just seem to keep getting better and better with AMC, but I’m scared. I don’t want my eyes to turn into jelly over the next couple of years.

Recently, AMC premiered a new show called Rubicon, which I also find sort of fantastic. I say “sort of” because I really feel like I’m too dumb to be watching it and I have to be missing a lot of clues. Also, with the premier of The Walking Dead this fall I will be watching more shows on AMC than I did on all other television channels combined just a few short years ago.


How in the hell could I not watch this?

My new plan is to only start watching new shows if I know they’re going to be of a certain quality and hopefully all these shit shows I watch get canceled or just end soon. It doesn’t seem likely though, because Entourage is in its what, 16th season now? It gets worse and worse every year, but I can’t even imagine not sticking it out, especially now that I put in this much time.

Even if I was somehow able to overcome this disease of not being able to stop watching something I know I’ll eventually relapse. One day you’ll find me bleeding from the eyes , covered with entire DVD box sets of TV shows I swore I would never watch again while mumbling “let’s hug it out bitch” to myself, after a week-long bender. There’s no way I could hold on to that sort of continued willpower.

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Breaking Bad

View Comments June 17, 2010 | JoshPerson

A few months ago I started on a journey to catch up on the very popular TV show Breaking Bad. I didn’t really know what to expect going in other than it was supposed to be amazing. “It’s the best show ever” is what I kept hearing from a variety of sources, so my expectations were extremely high while also anticipating a huge let down. Let’s just say, my streak of getting into the coolest things extremely late is still intact.

I’ll be honest, after the first two minutes of the pilot episode I about shut it off. A man in his underwear driving recklessly through the desert in an RV with a gas mask on just wasn’t my style. I figured I was in for another “Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas” situation where I was supposed to be watching the best thing ever, but remained severely annoyed through the entire thing. “OMG they’re on drugs, isn’t this amazing?” No.

I’m glad I stuck around though, because what happened after that completely caught my attention and I became quickly addicted. If you aren’t aware, Breaking Bad is about a man who’s a chemistry teacher who finds out he has lung cancer so he starts cooking crystal meth so he can leave his family with fortunes. The geeky, always introverted, teacher starts “breaking bad”.

There are two things this show consistently makes me feel while watching it. First and foremost it makes me want to be a drug dealer/distributor. I know every situation the main characters get into on the shows turns sour and they’re constantly fearing for their lives, but there’s still something so bad ass about it. The next thing the show makes me feel, up until the last season anyways, is that I’m developing cancer. Watching the teacher, Walter, coughing up body parts, passing out and then getting chemotherapy instantly makes me paranoid that I’m also dying.

Another thing that confuses me about this show is how people can think Skyler, Walter’s wife,  is hot. I read everywhere about how since she had the baby on the show she’s gotten amazing looking. Apparently guys are really into the whorey, bitch-face thing these days. Take notes, ladies. I, on the other hand am constantly annoyed by her. Then again, I feel like every woman on every TV show is holding the show back. Women just seem to always be getting in the way on TV shows and it upsets me. I’m not talking about wanting shows with only gay dudes or something. Women can have their small parts, but in no way should they have any plot line revolve around them.

Even with my few small complaints, this is now my most favorite show ever. Basically, if you haven’t seen this show we can never be friends and I will never come to your birthday party. I don’t care what kind of cake you have, I’m not coming. Also, if I ask if you’ve seen the show and you haven’t you’re getting an instant punch in the face. That’s how strongly I feel about this being the best show on television.

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Six Years Lost

View Comments June 3, 2010 | JoshPerson

I know I’m a little late talking about the Lost series finale, but I had to say something. It took me this long to convince myself to cover something every blog in the universe has talked about already. Even terrible blogs about blogging have brought this up. I, however, want to go a little more general in my rant and talk not only about series finales as a whole, but also the rage I feel when I hear people talking about these final episodes.

I watched the Lost series finale and thought it was alright, but I’m not like most people. I don’t hold such high expectations of TV shows to where no matter what happens I’m going to be disappointed. That’s what people did with Lost and a lot of other finales. They think “oh this is my favorite show, the most epic show on TV, this finale is going to be amazing!!!!” I compare it to going on a date with the hottest chick in the world, thinking you’re going to bang her at the end of the night. You start getting yourself mentally prepared by picturing the bang and running through all these banging scenarios in your head. Then once you get yourself worked up until you’re all boners by the end of the night you find out that this girl isn’t just a common slut and you leave with only a hug. Disappointing, sure, but you should realize that you’re not going to bang every girl on the first date, as unfortunate as that may be.

I find it hilarious how people reacted to the Lost finale. I can’t count how many times I saw someone saying “I JUST WASTED 6 YEARS OF MY LIFE!!!!1″. Do you know what that implies? That for the past 6 years you did nothing except watch episodes of Lost on repeat. How about you don’t take a fucking television show so seriously that it cancels out everything good you’ve done in your life over the last 6 years. I can’t help but think that these Lost fanatics who got married in the past 6 years are now all filing for divorce because that whole time was just pointless.

At least Lost wasn’t like most shows in that they don’t get to make a proper series finale. Most shows go off the air at the end of a regular season, leaving a million cliff-hangers out there and nobody gives a shit. Every time a show I like goes off the air out of nowhere I don’t think my entire time watching it was a waste of time. It’s fucking entertainment. “If I would have known Lost was going to end like this I wouldn’t have even watched it and since I would have so much free time I’d do something that I wouldn’t consider a waste of my life like, I don’t know, jerking off to internet porn, playing video games and reading comic books.” Nobody actually said that, but that’s what everyone complaining sounds like to me. How dare you take yourself that seriously. If you think your time is that important then stop watching the goddamn TV.

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