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Category: Site News

Updates For Everyone

View Comments August 8, 2010 | JoshPerson

Just wanted to remind everyone of a few things that I have going on with this blog area. Is it just me or do you cringe when you hear the word “blog”? There’s something very unsettling about that word to me, but I’ll get more into that and the hate I have for myself in a future blog post…

I desperately need people to start sending in more advice questions for me to answer. It’s a fun time and I really enjoy doing them. Plus, I don’t have what normal people call a “social life” so my queue of funny story scenarios are running thin. There’s only so many times I can tell funny Wal-Mart stories before I shoot my head off. So either send in questions or send me on vacations so I have something to talk about.

You can also use my regular contact form to send me in links to news stories or videos you’d like to see me talk about and most likely make fun of. I know I act like I hate everybody, including you, but I want you to be involved. I’d really like to hear from you folks on what you like about the site and what you want to see more of. Unless you go about it in a dickish manner we will become the bestest of friends, with me obviously being the more handsome one.

Don’t forget, I have a Facebook Fan Page and an Absurdly Awesome Twitter account. Right now they’re just harboring updates for new posts, but I’m trying to come up with more things to post about.

I mentioned this on a few blog posts previously, but if you need hosting for a website use DreamHost and use the affiliate links on this website (or click here). It’s who I’m hosting with currently and I find them to be fantastic. I’ve noticed no downtime and their control panel could have my babies if it wanted to.

Anyways, I think that’s it. Let me know you’re out there so I am better able to deal with the fact that I’m considered a “blogger”. If I find out I’m “blogging” for nobody I’ll just have to end it… The blog, not my life. I’m not suicidal or anything. One time I thought about suicide, but I didn’t want to see blood, if even for a second. I also didn’t go the pill route because I didn’t want a tummy ache. Also, my stuffed bear, Mr. Buttons, kept looking at me with disappointment when I was googling “suicide techniques”. I just wouldn’t be able to abandon him like that. I don’t think he’d survive foster care.

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Site News – June 6, 2010

View Comments June 6, 2010 | JoshPerson

Woah! What the hell is going on here? Things look all weird and stuff. That’s right, I changed the entire design of Absurdly Awesome. I know a lot of you people liked the old theme, but when you look at it every day while screaming “why am I not popular?!?!?” like I do, you tend start hating it. So my options were to either change the design or hunt down the server my website is hosted on, strap dynamite to it and kaboom it into pieces.

Anyways, there’s a poll on the sidebar for whether you like the design or not, so vote your little heart out. Plus, I’ll still be making some tweaks to the site, so if you have any features in mind that you’d like to see here either comment on this post or fill out the contact form. Don’t be afraid, like most people are, to contact me. I double pinky swear that I won’t make fun of you.

New Logo! This site needs a new logo very badly. The one that’s up there now got created in a moment of haste. It just looks lazy. So if you’re good with graphics, create something for me! I’ll pick the best one to use and promote whatever you want on this very blog! The image should be 425 x 100 and suit this new site design well. Extra points for a grunge-type look, but that’s not completely necessary.

That’s about it. As always, help promote the website, post it on your Facebook wall, Twitter about it, do whatever you have to do to get the word out. For instance, if you have a Facebook fan page with thousands of fans, throw my link up there. The more people I get on this site the more I’ll post. Also, thanks to all the people who have been promoting this site like crazy. You make my heart erect with love.

Need advice? Submit a question or situation you need advice on and I’ll make a blog post about it. It’s completely confidential!

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Kindle This

View Comments May 10, 2010 | JoshPerson

When the Amazon Kindle e-book reader first came out I was completely against it. I believe I said something along the lines of “what the f is this s?” I just couldn’t see myself abandoning physical books for this newfangled, technological faggotry. This has changed with time, though, mostly because I want to support anything that is even slightly going up against the annoyance that is the iPad.

This whole Kindle desire got deeper just a few weeks ago as the only legitimate book store within 90 miles of my home town closed down. Apparently, most people in Mediocre-ville Iowa don’t like reading and why would they? They’ve got stupidity to perfect. These are the same types of people who on their MySpace page (yes, they’re still on that ghost town of a website) under the “Books” section write something like “lol wuts readin?” Good point.

Don’t get me wrong, I can sort of see where they’re coming from. Reading is fucking hard to do sometimes. I often go through entire chapters of a book before I realize that I wasn’t actually reading any of it. I was basically just skimming it with my eyes while my mind was off somewhere else thinking about how if people tried breaking into my apartment I would take them out and get thrown into the middle of this insane conspiracy, Jason Bourne style.

Reading can also be daunting when I buy a new book about a topic that interests me, like Neil Tyson DeGrasse’s Death By Black Hole, but by the middle of the first page I realize how fucking dumb I actually am. Reading turns into a chore when you have to do in-depth research about every fifth word.

Anyways, the point to all of this is that you should all buy Kindles, even if you don’t like reading anything outside of ridiculous blogs. Why would you do something like this? Well, because this blog is now up on the Amazon Kindle store! I say that like my blog got picked up by some huge company and I’m getting paid millions, when in reality all I had to do was sign up for an account.

So what I want all of you to do is go on there, subscribe and write positive reviews. It only costs $1.99 per month to subscribe too. Just so you know, I didn’t get to pick the price. If I was allowed to pick the price I would be charging several hundreds of dollars per month because that’s what I feel this blog is worth. I don’t know if you can write a review without purchasing it first, but if you can and you don’t even own a Kindle, still write the review. It doesn’t have to be long and impressive, just give it five stars and type something like “I laughed so hard my eyes popped out.”

Absurdly Awesome on the Amazon Kindle Store

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