Zombie Obsession
For the last few months I’ve gone through a major transformation in my life. If you told me years ago that I would be huge into zombies I probably would have belly laughed for hours while murdering you. Not that I was ever against the entire zombie culture, it just wasn’t something I had ever explored, or thought that I could get into. Perhaps that’s because the only movies I watched were romantic comedies either with women for the sole purpose of tricking them into having sex with me or by myself while crying deeply into and rubbing on a body pillow.
This whole zombie fascination started many months ago and for no particular reason. I think I was just tired of watching normal movies and needed a change. Plus, I was starting to watch shows about ghosts, which could very well have been my gateway to zombies. Either way, I decided to have a zombie movie month where I wouldn’t watch a film unless it had a zombie in it. Probably the greatest idea I’ve had in my life and that’s including the time I came up with the awesome phrase “if you’re fat and annoying at least bring treats”.
Before I knew it I was full blown zombie obsessed and not only just with the movies. I’m currently working through a book titled “The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead” and am obsessed with the video game series Left 4 Dead. Not to mention that I’ve had several dreams, in which I’m slaughtering zombie after zombie just trying to survive the outbreak. I’ve also been spending far too much time mentally preparing for a zombie outbreak. We should really be using these goddamn undeads to help wean people off of other, more serious addictions, like those of heroin or the addiction most women have for my approval.
Don’t get me wrong, my zombie-mania isn’t without its drawbacks. The main drawback thus far is that all of my friends and family (none of which are into zombies) think I’m completely insane. I’m also paranoid that people who have been into zombies for a long time will look down on me as some sort of poser for just getting into them recently. That problem isn’t helped by the fact that I watched probably 15 zombie movies over the span of one month and can’t readily pull titles or references to any of them with any sort of confidence. All that combined with the fact that my sex life has gone downhill because zombie movies aren’t tricking any girl into sleeping with me, none visually worth a bang anyways. Still, add up all those negatives and I still feel I come out on top with this new obsession and it doesn’t seem to be fading any time soon.
Category: General Posts
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